BlackWingedAngelic

Today i deleted all the old deviations n this account because I have decided to begin again. I don't feel like the person who held this account then and the person I am now are similar enough to allow me to maintain the account as it was.  Hopefully I will be repopulating this account, til then I am mostly keeping it as a means of keeping up With the artists i watch.

I guess I'm selfish.  Jeremy cheated on another girl and Mom wants me to let him move in.  I said it wasn't gonna happen.  We would look for something else before I would put one more thing on the relationship anymore.  Mom didn't see how living with my older brother who constantly has friends over, makes huge messes, eats everything, is in his thirties and still laughs at fart jokes and picks on me and my boyfriend constantly wouldnt completely change my living arrangement.  I guess that makes me selfish that that isn't ok with me.

Everything from the knot in my throat to the tips of my toes jerks down in some incredible show of centrifugal force as the world stops spinning.   Funny how three letters change the energy of something in such a completely polarizing way.  How something that felt so warm and healthy before, so comfortable and safe starts to feel like the bait to a trap, or the compliment sandwich put together to dress up the elephant in the room.  He says I'm too much emotional stress, that he loves me, that he's thought of seeing other people, that he wants to be with me, that he's not sure he can be happy with me, that I make him happy, that he doesn't kno